The time I spent at RTC changed my life. I learned how to cope with my issues, past and present, and I learned more about myself than I had ever learned previously. I owe a lot of that to Eugene especially, and the spiritual instruction he provided for the program.
The first time I stepped into his “class” I didn’t know really what to expect, and similarly, the last time I stepped into his class I didn’t really know what to expect. It didn’t take long to realize that Eugene is passionate about what he does, and he knows what everyone is going through because he has been through it himself. This was not your typical class, there wasn’t a script or a rubric, but there was a path. He would show you the path and you had to work to stay on it, just as someone would when they work the steps. The group of individuals that stepped into his class for the first time was exactly that, a group of individuals, lost in purpose without any true understanding of spiritual growth and honesty. By challenging us collectively, we all became responsible for one another, and the true message shined through. I realized we would not make it out of here changed or absolved if we did not adhere to these principles of honesty, willingness and trust which many of us had never fully committed to, or at some point had chosen to abandon.
As Eugene so eloquently put it, “The ego must be smashed completely.” The old way had failed me. Whatever old flaws of personality or methods of thinking which had become second nature to me, had to be eradicated in order for me to truly start anew and change my way of thinking. He knew that all of us were afraid; fear had been dictating our lives. My vulnerabilities were deep seeded and only through uncovering the past and opening the doors I wanted to stay closed would I be able to drop my guard and surrender. When and only when this happened, could I absorb the basic message of the program, and truly hold myself to a difficult, but necessary path of rigorous honesty and self-reflection.
I believe without this structural foundation to overcome the obstacles I have faced, (Many of them my own doing) I would not have been successful. I also believe my success could not and cannot be achieved purely by clinical methods of diagnosis and/or reciting coping strategies. This experience was extremely personal to me, inconveniently personal at times, but I will never forget it. Eugene did not get me sober, but he showed many of us the way, and the program has done the rest for me.
Sincerely,
Adrian W.
